Tuesday, February 9, 2010

DFS ... Welcome to the Fail Boat!

Topher's mom is an addict.  In addition, she's been diagnosed with schizophrenia.  If that wasn't enough, she's got cancer.  Don't get me wrong ... I'm not going to make any excuses for her.  Rather than dealing with her problems she used illegal drugs to cope.  I have big problems with the choices she made and with the danger she put her children in.  I'm just setting the stage.

You see, she got busted for using a couple weeks back, but was lucky enough to dodge jail.  She is working with the Department of Family Services (DFS) so she can keep her kids out of foster care, because the system often does a lot more damage than good.  That's why Topher is staying with us, under voluntary guardianship, rather than being taken by the state.  It's helping him focus on being a kid while she works at putting together a safe environment for him to return to.

I'm praying she can pull it off.  I'm afraid, for everyone's sake, that she may not be able to.  No matter what the outcome, I will be staying in Topher's life and will fight tooth and nail to keep him safe.

But, fears and opinions about her lifestyle aside, it's not fair for DFS to set her up to fail.  They've said they're going to help her with rehab and get her on some medication to control her medical and mental health issues.  She talked to the mental health doctor they referred her to.  He won't prescribe any medications for her until her sees her, which is understandable, but the next available appointment they have is in the middle of May.  They told her that she's just going to have to hold it together until then.  DFS won't recommend a different doctor, so she's stuck.


This is a woman who hasn't spent 3 weeks clean in the last 7 years, and uses to control her pain and her brain ... and they want her to stay clean for 3 months unmedicated?  She is literally hallucinating in her own bedroom after 22 days clean ... she's scared to walk her dog for fear she won't be able to find her way home ... how can she possibly hold it together 3 more months?  I may not like her, I may not respect her, but treating anyone like that is downright indecent and inhumane!

So, I'm sending out a prayer request.  Pray for Topher's mom.  Pray that she gets the help she needs, and can hold it together until then.  Pray that there's a cancellation and she can get in sooner.  Pray DFS reconsiders and finds her a doctor that can see her sooner.  If for no other reason, pray that she doesn't break a little boy's heart.

Please pray for all of us, but especially for her, because DFS is failing her, and without our prayers, I honestly don't know if she'll survive this.

        aka: goofdad

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